Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Baby's Mama

Look. I'm married, cook, do the window treatments, landscaping, painting, and hold a 9-5.  and i'm a dude.  My lovely lady also keeps a tight ship around here.

And we both don't want kids.

Point of fact, that was one of the many reasons we got married.  I'm going on thirty now, and she's - well, a lady should never reveal her age, so why should I do it for her?  Better put, we've been together for twelve years now, and in all that time not ONCE have we toyed with the concept of having kids.  No false positives, none of that.  I enjoy this article (see end of blog post) and will be sharing it, because I don't believe the public accepts those that choose to live a child-free life and, frankly, I'm exhausted of always having to "accept" those that have kids - and their insistence that I WILL have some myself in this fictional future they've concocted. Now, provided I haven’t incurred any brain altering trauma, I plan to continue trudging the course, as does m'lady. 

Is there a magic to it?  Are we just selfish assholes?  No, and, possibly.  I mean, sure – we are affirming that we would either be awful parents, that we don’t want to give up our lifestyles, or that we don’t want to care for one more living creature in this house. We do, however, both volunteer at an animal rescue (she, twice a week, even), and I like to run for different charities, while joining her on these shelter expeditions.  Do we have any medical restrictions? - nope.   Well, none that I’ve had any need to have my equipment checked over for.  My boys are good, as are her.. um... inner boys?  whatevs. 

Bottom line: it's not a matter of now and then, physiology, or some weird psychology.  I am just completely apathetic to the cause of having children.  I, literally, want nothing to do with any of them.  She is the same.  Why am I taking the time to even talk about it if I don't care? - To provide perspective.  No understanding is complete without all sides.  Could my upbringing in a sub-par educational standard by drug-addled parental guardians have anything to do with it? - given that the modern alternative is hipsters, the answer is squarely "no."  I just don't care for kids, nor the concept.   The only twist to the standard models of deviation that I could offer is that I am very absurdly domesticated, but I view that as more a matter of independence and survival, than a paternal patterning.

And that's about it - some people, really, just don't want kids.  This is something she and I have always agreed on.  It does not form the basis of our marriage, so there's no fear if that were to change, but, there's simply no desire for children.  It's almost like a subconscious awareness that the world is sitting on more kids than adults to tend them that shuts down my desire to want them.  Who knows? - I, for one, am not inclined to care.

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